I'm not sleepy now so I guess I'll work on a website. I didn't realize the theme was going to be a problem so the stuff related to the gallery is moot.
Now I'm just going to attempt to convert the entire site into static using a tool I've used since ... 2002? Waiting ...
https://shiitake.us-east.host.bsky.network/xrpc/com.atproto.sync.getBlob?did=did:plc:tbr4cunn6r4hox73ybzjfwt3&cid=bafkreifrczaxt5qjfea76r67lkdw4daz7wjkahxoqp333k3l674gi6m3dq