I feel like Pep told his team "play like the champions" and they thought he meant Liverpool, so they threw everybody into the high press and left their world-class goalkeeper for dead #FediFC

Yep, United an offensive powerhouse, City an empty shell. Think we all saw this coming based on their form over the last, oh let’s say 10 years. #FediFC #MNUMCI

I'm only surprised that the ref didn't give Dalot a hug and a cookie after that ankle-breaker tackle. #FediFC

John Harbaugh going to the Giants will be an enormous boost to a team that only won 7 games last season— *producer whispers in ear* that’s how much BOTH New York teams won? Total? Holy crap, dude, New York sucks

Just whipped this baby up for the Trump-Machado presser later today, where he inevitably mugs with the Nobel Peace Prize he didn’t win

Claude Cowork is pronounced “cow ork” Users are known as cow orkers This is canon, don’t bother looking it up

Non-USians, please try to be kind to your gringo friends* at this time. I cannot impress upon you how mind-bending it is that any day, we're likely to wake up to the news that our country is at war, and we are genuinely, unironically going to have to ask: "with whom?"

This Iran stuff is just bonkers. Reza Pahlavi has just started popping up on TV, all tanned, rested and ready to become the next Shah. As if a bunch of student protesters are going to want to overthrow the Islamic Republic, at significant cost to themselves, just so we can roll in and reinstall a puppet government.